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Writer's pictureTanner Hnidey

Canada's Scariest Haunted House | The House Of Commons

The scariest house in Canada is the haunted House of Commons. Men and women more spiritually dead than the ghosts and ghouls of Halloween roam the halls of Parliament, nourishing themselves with the economic souls of Canadians and sacrificing our well-being to a pantheism of green energy and socialism.


We tend to think the most dangerous places in the world (or outside it) are shrouded in the dark, but that’s simply not true. Satan disguises himself as an angel of light, and a dark soul, like the angler in Mariana’s Trench, uses that light to lead men into the destruction. When politicians, armed with sly smiles, handshakes, and promises, introduce themselves, we put our faith in their “salvation” hook, line, and sinker. Regrettably, we realize too late that the politician’s true intent is not to save, but to devour.


Parliament is so scary because its members feel no condemnation for their actions. A Halloween monster might eventually feel remorse for the terror he’s caused, but our government doesn’t feel the same. Jekyll hates Hyde, but Justin does not hate Trudeau.


As far as the House of Commons is concerned, they might be hurting Canadians, but only because they’re healing the nation. At least, that’s what they publicly argue. Even if Trudeau intends to crash the economy (as I believe he does), his conscience justifies it for some greater purpose. Just as a doctor has to set a broken leg to cast, government believes it must drive the economy into recession to keep business afloat. A dentist hurts his patient with a needle so he can fill a cavity, and government believes it must lock down the country to keep it alive.


But too many policies have been judged based on intentions rather than outcomes. To lock us down, to force us to pay outrageous taxes, to punish our families for heating their homes, to endanger the supply of gas and diesel, to demand we worship wokeism; who cares whether government thinks it’s “helping” us or not?


Do not be deceived into thinking we’re being too harsh with these MPs. They scare us with socialism. They terrorize our families by threatening (and executing those threats) to lock up peaceful protestors. They demand higher and higher payments for using the critical compound of oil we need to survive, and when we're struggling to survive, they tell us to euthanize ourselves. They do all these things, yet they expect us to exalt their thrones.


What are we supposed to call these men and women? Who else can we say roams the haunted House of Commons? We label these politicians with a word—a word reserved for people who encourage tragically sick and ill men to kill themselves as a form of “liberation”—and it's appropriate for Halloween:


Monsters.


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